<body> *`/so thankful I found you. A:link { text-decoration: none; color: gray;} _my love for you;

Of all the earthly music, that which reaches farthest into heaven is the beating of a truly loving heart.

Y sheenaaa

26oct1988

nineteen

singapore poly

im not young.not yet old

Y Desires

knitted white jacket

river island wallet

off-shoulder top

black shorts

Y Music playing

Jay Chou - Tui Hou

Y Say Your Piece

Y By My Side

Bishi

JoanJoan

Jennyfurr

Y love counter

long nite
Monday, August 07, 2006

=) last i wrote kn wanted to meet for breakfast. but when he called me i felt he sounded tired n so i asked him to go slp. so we didnt but we met up later in the noon. we went to Jurong pt.. we walked ard n he tried to make me laugh.. sweetie..=)

anyway.. yest nitex.. i couldnt go to slp n i dun wanna go hm.. so i met up wif hsia n we toked.. learnt a lot btw..
after tt.. me n sujin n hsia went n tok. sujin noes a lot but he refuse to tell me anythin n he kept fooling ard wif hsia.. -.-'' after our lil supper session.. we went to near xiang's place to sit n tok..

finally.. he asked.. wat's between u n hs? so i was like.. nth ma.. jus unhappy wif each other tt's all.. then he keep saying.. really meh? really lydat meh?
then xiang came down le.. xiang looked at me n asked me whether i had feelings for hs.. then sujin n hsia went away.. we spent hours n hours toking..we toked til 5 am + and sujin told hsia stuff.. n sujin expects hsia to tell me -.-'' y cant sujin tell me in person..

but it seems like if i dun tok to hs.. we might not even b frens.. tts bad.. real bad..
i dun wan tt to happen..

but after hearing sum hurtful things tt sujin has said.. i realised a lotta stuff..but i didnt feel sad or hurt.. i feel emotionless.. even hsia asked me whether m i ok cos i look v cool n calm.. in fact i am..i dunno y.. i told her.. prob i heard too much in a nite n not much has been registered in my mind n things complicated me.. so.. yah..but then again.. if tt morn..all those stuff tt hs said to sujin.. if they were true.. im utterly disappointed.. picking out my old bad pts n toking abt it.. i mean.. those are in the past.. if u really wanna tok abt wats gg on now.. u shld go straight to the pt n not make urself look as if u haf done enough..n i did nth n im bad.. when i toked to xiang or sujin.. i keep telling them i noe im in the wrong.. i noe sum things i did were bad but come to think of it.. he nv felt tt he did anythign wrong.. -.-'' ironic.

reached hm at 6 n slept at 6+.. well.. tt explains y i didnt go to sch today cos i couldnt wake up..

i dunno but during tt steamboat nite.. i tried v hard to put down tt kinda feelings to tok n smile to him..n sujintold hsia..hs wanted to tok to me.. i told hsia.. he WANTED but he DIDNT..he SHOULD HAF done sumthin.. if smth were to happen between us n smth were to go wrong. don put the blame on me. cos i did try to gif in.. but u? u only thot of giving in.. but u didnt.. tt's the diff..but i really dun wish such a beautiful frenship to go to waste.. no matter wat we noe.. the possibility of gg back to how we used to is like 40%..but at least we are still frens =)

watever it is.. im trying hard =)

-wingless-